It will be overwhelming, scary, unfamiliar and yes, a bit sad.
Grant had a difficult time grasping that.
But won't he be happy to be with us / me?
Sure, but imagine leaving the only home and the only friends (who are his family ) you've ever known.
We tried to explain that he may cry and get frustrated and be confused about whether or not he will go back to Haiti to live.
Will he have his very own room, for the first time in his life?
Yep.
Overwhelming.
He can get a snack or a drink whenever he wants and always have enough to eat . . .
Strange.
Permanent?
Overwhelming.
Toys, TV, a full closet of clothes and his own bathroom: Really?
Overwhelming.
Guilt producing??
We also talked about how he must feel when we visit then leave.
Eric told them about June 2012 when we were with him, had to travel to Jacmel for 2 days for surgery and then returned . . .
He wouldn't talk to us.
He was hurt and angry, and obviously told his friends, who threw rocks at us.
Eventually, they began playing with Eric and then Dimitry came out.
When Michele sat on my lap, Dimitry wanted me too.
He was broken and didn't want to be left, for any reason.
Still brings tears to my eyes.
In less than two weeks, I will travel again, and see him for a very short day and 1/2 for visa interviews.
How confusing is this for him?
Hello Son. I love you. I want you so much. Goodbye.
I pray that, somehow, his heart will be protected through all this.
Someday, I hope he can understand how long we worked to give him a mommy and a daddy and siblings.
We never want to leave him.
Grant thinks they will never argue or disagree or not want to play with each other --
he doesn't believe us that it won't be a honeymoon.
I suppose all we can do is talk to them about it and love them all through it.
Dear God,
Please protect these little hearts that yearn for love and acceptance, but struggle to understand the wait and the permanence. Bring our child home to us soon. Let us hold him and kiss him and give him a forever family, finally.
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